Dear Mr. Right Arm, I really appreciate the 20 years of good service you have given me. In fact, I enjoyed your service so much that I promoted you to the executive arm position. I know I have not always treated you well, but please realize the cuts, scrapes, scratches, and burns hurt me as much as they hurt you. Also realize that except for rock climbing, any pain given was unintentional. I am truly sorry that you took the brunt of the accident at work on Thursday, and next time I am up on scaffolding 12 feet in the air I promise to try and do a better job of not falling off backwards (or falling off at all for that matter.) I hope you can grasp in spite of all the pain meds I'm pumping into you that the surgery on Friday was for your own good. I know that it hurts more now but the screw and the wire that the doctor put into you will help you get back to normal hopefully in two months or so. And don’t worry about the metal in you too much, in about 9 months we'll take them back out after you've healed. I would really appreciate it if you would cooperate with me a little though instead of forcing me to not move. It would also be really nice if you'd share the blood with the rest of the body instead of hogging it all in your self inflated swollen state. Sincerely, Jody So basically Thursday I fell ~12 backwards off some scaffolding onto hard packed dirt. It knocked the breath out of me for about a minute, bruised my right ankle, right hip, and gave me an olecranon fracture…basically I broke off the end of my ulna bone where the tricep muscle attaches. So Friday afternoon I had surgery. They put me under general anesthesia and when I woke up… my arm hurt a lot more so they gave me a lot of morphine and some narcotics. Since them I've spent two days taking narcotics every two and a half hours trying not to over exert myself (read as "trying not to do anything.") So now, instead of being in Spain where I was going to be traveling with my sister for three weeks, I am trying not to go crazy. And I have somewhat succeeded in that for the first 2 days out of 6 weeks or so. | 
